The month in pictures...

These are some of my favorite pictures from the month. Evan is changing every day and has such a fun personality! There have been a LOT of 1st's this month!!! He loves all his big boy toys and has also found his voice. It is hilarious to hear him talking and yelling in this high pitch voice he does!

1st time in the exersaucer

1st time in the jumparoo, this is his favorite!

1st time eating rice cereal, this was super funny- he did a great job! His hands are always in his mouth so it was everywhere! He got a bath immediately after. haha!

1st time in the outside swing on our swing set. This is something I used to sit on the deck & daydream about when I was on bed rest, this was so emotional seeing my real live baby in here!

He usually has his fingers or whole fist in his mouth but when he gets his thumb in he's in heaven & cries so hard when he loses suction & can't figure out how to get it back in! You put his binky in instead & he calms down and settles for that :)

Mother's Day! Evan & I were in our own little world that day. I was just so so beyond thankful that I was chosen to be his Mom. I just can't think or say it enough! Amy & Riley got him this shirt when I was pregnant, it is so cute!

A year...

I really should be cleaning or doing laundry right now, or something productive - yet I sit here on the computer reflecting on the past year. With Mother's Day just a week from tomorrow I am so amazed on where we are today compared to where we were exactly a year ago. The other day we received a letter in the mail asking what we would like to do with our frozen embryos for the upcoming year. Thankful that we have those embryos I marked "keep frozen" and this is when my reflection began.

I've spent the past hour skimming at what I sat in this very chair and wrote a year ago

April 24th..."today felt like Christmas morning" I said when I received the huge box of IVF meds.
May 11th...waiting & waiting to receive a phone call from the clinic "Happy Mother's Day. Enjoy your day - your embies are making it to day 5"
May 15th...reflecting on May 13th, when our precious embryos were transferred - "I've never wanted anything so bad in my life. How do you love something that is microscopic?"
May 18th...reflecting on the day before when I almost passed out at Sharky's and the hyperstimulation began, I was freaking out that my body's reaction was hurting our embies - "Wow, how messed up is my life right now...I find comfort in getting a shot in my hip that takes about a century to push through the syringe". I remember this feeling like it was yesterday - those progesterone oil shots were like a mental drug for me, it was the hope in my day and the physical pain they caused meant nothing. It was just a shot of hope for me, I was crazy with progesterone - shots, hand cream, suppositories - I was constantly applying progesterone every single hour. Oh, and this statement now just makes me laugh - "I was very frustrated that once again the couch was my BFF for the day, yet relieved we didn't have to go to the hospital. How naive I was!" (said that b/c later that day I ended up in ER). But the funny part - I thought I was naive THEN?! I had NO idea of what I was about to go through, both physically and emotionally. Hmm, days later I would hyperstimulate to the extreme - I would be the patient that our IVF teacher spoke of, I remember her saying "this scenario is extremely rare but I have to say it because it could potentially happen, but its only happen once in my 20 years of working here, and it wasn't to this extreme". ha, once again - funny. Guess she can't say that anymore in the classes she taught after me. Then the crazy roller coaster began. I was sick of the couch then?! haha, "my BFF" as I said in that post would be for the next 9 months!

So many things - and now here we are, the luckiest people in the world, blessed beyond our dreams with this healthy, beautiful, amazing baby boy. All our wonders are answered and our days are spent being a family and taking care of this little person we've created. I love every single second of it. My level of happiness has exceeded any expectations I ever had. I still soak Evan's tiny almost bald head with my tears pretty much daily - I am just so thankful to be his Mommy. My daily prayers that he would be alright have now turned into daily thank-you's that he is healthy and mine. My precious baby boy.