Slap Happy but READY!

This weekend was quite crazy to say the least. Being stressed that you started your period 3 days later than you were supposed to then a few hours later walk into your parents' house (who by the way, are in Figi) on your lunch break to feed their cat to find a full-out rain storm in their basement, with damage to their main floor as well. Well, that is enough to make someone (me) lose it! What a horrible thing to come home from vacation to. I feel so so bad for them. But, it could have been much worse. When they arrived home yesterday my body was like a wet noodle. Relief that they were home safely and neither of them had a heart attack as my sister and I told them about what they were about to see when they entered their house. :( I had to quickly snap out of my noodle state because hello, I'm starting IVF today people, I have things to do! So instead of the nap I was longing to take yesterday, I did yard work, laundry, and some re-organizing to help focus my mind. It worked - I woke up looking forward to going in for my baseline scan and blood work. Which actually turned out to be not anything like what I expected. In my rosy little world I was picturing some quick pics with the magic wand and walking out of there feeling like nothing happened. No such luck. Apparently my left ovary decided to be a comedian today and disappear. They never did find it- but they didn't seem very concerned. Weird. But that just follows suit with every other stunt that my body thinks is fun. The nurse told the resident..."here I'll do it, its not you - its just a hard scan". Yep. Fun times on this Monday morning. After what seemed like an eternity she said she wouldn't put me through anymore and stopped. So here I am, crampy as all get-out but anxiously waiting for 4:00 when they call me (with hopefully good news that we can do our first shot tonight). I'm so excited! Max is too, can you tell?

Holy Crapoli - this is happening and I can't wait!

Sat. the UPS man came bright and early delivering everything we will need for IVF! I tore it open like it was Christmas morning, it was SO exciting! So, everyday I've been waking up and seeing some of the meds in the fridge and just wishing for my period to come. So ironic - I've never wanted it to come so bad. ha. I need to start today in order to have a true baseline ultrasound & blood work...my body needs to pay attention and be more on top of things - it was supposed to start yesterday. My body is ready - I started a high protein diet this week, heard that makes your body in the best shape for implantation. But - I'm worried about my mind-set. I'm a worrier anyways and I have read so much that the emotional side plays a huge role in the success of IVF. I've never done any type of meditation before...that was going to be one of the positive Thursday events that my sister and I were going to do, but my body wasn't cooperating and then when it was, our diaper cake business started which has turned our time into "positive every day" vs "positive Thursday". So I found a meditation/guided imagery cd designed for IVF! It seems awesome - and the reviews were enough to make me order it. There are 4 cds...1 for each stage of IVF. It should be at my doorstep today when I get home - perfect timing!

The Plan

Yesterday was our IVF class. I was very nauseous the whole time and kept thinking I was either going to pass out or vomit. Hearing all the things that can happen is a little much. And learning some new info. was scary - I just assumed that once the baby was here, it was just like any baby that was naturally conceived. The reality is that our baby will be more susceptible to some things, the % isn't that much higher, but it is higher. Very scary. There were 4 other couples in the class; all but 1 couple seemed just as nervous as we were. The nurse was a great teacher, and the office tried to make the environment less nerve-wracking and warm by offering us food and drinks. The table still had the same amount of donuts and bagels when we left. It was kind of comforting knowing everyone was feeling like we were...going into the unknown. After the group class we went into a private room with a nurse. It was time for us to give me trial shots. I surprised myself and actually looked at the needle and gave myself a shot in the belly! AND didn't get dizzy! Then it was Mike's turn to get the big daddy needle ready and give me the inner-muscular shot in my hip. He had a different reaction then I thought; not to say I thought he was excited to give me shots, but he has a "tough guy" persona. He did a great job giving me the shot, it sucked for both of us and I'm not sure we'll ever get used to it. When we were walking out together I felt such a strong feeling of us being a team. For once I was the one telling him "we can do this". I know it must suck that he will be the one causing me to be in pain, (not to say I'm super pumped about being on the receiving end of the shots!)...but we have to focus on the end result. Once the morning sunk in and all of the side affects and statistics faded I was left with excitement. Last night while delivering diaper cakes to twins, we heard a wonderful story told by their Dad about how long they tried to have a baby and longed for one...and here are their miracles! 5 lbs each laying on their bellies in front of the fire. So precious, and also so very ironic that we met him and his babies the same day as our class. He said it must be in the water, that 2 couples they are friends with are pregnant after going through similar things. I asked if I could have a drink of water and take a shower while I was there :) Anyways, we got this binder yesterday full of how to administer each shot, what each drug does, its side affects, etc. But the most exciting page that I keep looking at over and over is the one titled "your plan"...its a timeline of when we'll start this next journey...the last thing on the list...the date of my pregnancy test!!!